Hannah Vaughn’s full-length plays include Away From, The Unfathomable Blue, and Look Up or Why We Don’t Go Camping Anymore. Her work has been seen at Dixon Place, The Players Theatre, Actors Theatre of Santa Cruz, Left Coast Theatre Company and developed with Fresh Ground Pepper, Paper Kraine, Live Source Theatre Group, and The Navigators She is the co-creator and co-star of the web series, Dates Like This. For more information, visit hannahvaughn.com.

Violet Clifford’s Senior Prank Extravaganza

Hannah Vaughn

CAST OF CHARACTERS

VIOLET– 17, female, any race; a high school senior, queen bee

LUCY– 17, female, any race; a high school senior, an old friend

SETTING

Present day. A small American town. The backyard of Mr. Goodwin’s house. A backyard, night time. The glow from a swimming pool. Violet sneaks out of the bushes.

 

VIOLET

Come on!

 

LUCY

Hang on.

 

VIOLET

Lucy! Hurry up!

 

LUCY

It’s fucking heavy as shit. I’m coming.

VIOLET

Jesus.

 

LUCY

You could help you know. They’re your bags. 

 

VIOLET

Eh.

 

Lucy emerges from the edges with 3 huge laundry bags, all very full.

 

LUCY

Here you go.

 

VIOLET

You are the slowest of slow. I thought you were supposed to be super woman or something.

LUCY

It’s Wonder Woman. And no, I’m not. I am fast when I’m running track, not when I’m carrying your heavy-ass bags all around creation.

 

VIOLET

Hey this was your idea too.

 

LUCY

Nope this is your idea – ‘Violet Clifford’s Senior Prank Extravaganza’ I believe is how you pitched it to me.

 

VIOLET

Uhh – I don’t think so.

LUCY

I’m pretty sure I have it in my texts somewhere. 

 

(pulls out phone, scrolls, shows Violet her phone)

 

See. 

 

(Violet rolls her eyes) 

Wow. The last text from you before that was from 2 years ago. 

 

VIOLET

Well, anyway.You could have backed out. You didn’t have to come. 

 

LUCY

Umm… you made it abundantly clear what would happen if I didn’t. 

 

VIOLET

What can I say? 

 

LUCY

Eugsh - I’ve known you for too long. 

 

VIOLET

You’re still smart as hell. 

 

LUCY

Smart, strong, fast. Maybe I am Wonder Woman.

 

VIOLET

Just throw on a sick onesie, a cape and a crown and let’s see if you can pull it off.

 

LUCY

You wish.

 

VIOLET

That would be hot.

 

LUCY

Shut up, Violet.

 

VIOLET

Fine.

 

LUCY

This is a nice house.

 

VIOLET

It’s a dirty shit hole.

 

LUCY

It’s a nice house, Violet. You can’t deny it.

 

VIOLET

It won’t be soon. 

 

A quiet moment as they watch the pool.  

 

LUCY

So what now?

 

VIOLET

Now we dump.

 

LUCY

You don’t want to like say something? Ceremoniously?

 

VIOLET

 

LUCY

I don’t know.

 

VIOLET

I’m not an evil villain about to give her final monologue before she gets secretly stabbed from behind by the hero.

 

LUCY

Did I say that you were?

 

VIOLET

That’s pretty much what you implied.

 

LUCY

If it’s an extravaganza, doesn’t that justify a speech?

 

VIOLET

JEEZUS. It’s not that serious. 

 

LUCY

I’m just saying if you were willing to spend thousands of dollars on fucking Jell-o…

VIOLET

Oh my god. Lucy. You don’t know anything.

 

LUCY

OK Fine.

 

VIOLET

You know what? Now I do kind of want to say something. This does feel like it warrants a speech.

 

LUCY

Or an incantation.

VIOLET

I’m not a fucking WITCH, OK?!

 

LUCY

Ok – jeez calm down!

 

VIOLET

Oh I’m calm. 

 

Violet reaches for one of the bags. She pulls out an IV bag filled with blood. She stands ceremoniously by the pool's edge, holding the bag in her two hands.

LUCY

What the fu-

VIOLET

On this night. The twelfth of June.

We beseech thee, oh gods, to help/

 

LUCY

/That’s blood/

 

VIOLET

/us in our mission.

Make this liquid move swiftly and boldly. 

May this small body of water clog and congeal. 

LUCY

That’s a shit ton of blood.

 

VIOLET

(louder)

May it frustrate and dismay.

May it cause uproar and panic.

Doubt and suspicion. 

 

LUCY

How the FUCK did you get blood? You told me this was Jell-O!!

 

VIOLET

I lied.

 

LUCY

You made me carry 3 bags of blood down here?! WHY blood?! I thought this was just a stupid prank. 

 

VIOLET

It is in a way.

 

LUCY

A prank doesn’t usually involve this many gallons of blood. Serious crimes, murders, usually involve this many gallons. 

 

VIOLET

We’re not murdering anyone, Lucy. Calm down. And they measure blood in liters, not gallons. Metric system and all that.

 

LUCY

Where did you even get this much blood?

 

VIOLET

The blood drive at school? I paid good money for this.

 

LUCY

How?!

 

VIOLET

I got access to my mom’s credit card. The cash allowance on those is phenomenal. Plus I’ve been babysitting for about five years. I’m very frugal. I had about $40,000 saved up.

 

LUCY

In your sock drawer!?

 

VIOLET

No, dummy, I have a bank account. Like real person. 

 

LUCY

So you’re just going to dump a shit ton of blood into his pool?

 

VIOLET

Yes. That’s part 1. 

 

LUCY

This is too fucking weird. I can’t do this.

 

VIOLET

You have to help me, Lucy. 

 

LUCY

No! I don't - I'm not going to be an accomplice to your crazy blood prank! I could lose my scholarship.

 

VIOLET

There are more important things than a track scholarship.

 

LUCY

Not if your parents can’t afford college.

 

VIOLET

You’re not going to get caught, Lucy. I’ve thought this through. 

I’ve disabled the security system. 

 

LUCY

What?!

 

VIOLET

No one is getting video of this shit. You know I plan ahead.

 

LUCY

Why are you doing this?

 

VIOLET

It’s a game of intimidation, Lucy. We’re going to fill his pool with blood, then we smear his house with shit.

 

LUCY

/Excuse me?/

 

VIOLET

And when his neighbors wake up and smell that gorgeous smell and see a fucking pool full of blood, they’re going to freak the fuck out. Probably call the cops. There’s going to be a lot of questions.

 

LUCY

Yeah like WHO did this?

 

VIOLET

No one is watching. We’re wearing gloves, we’re not going to leave fingerprints.  We’re fine. We’re going to get away with this.

 

LUCY

JEZUS. What did Mr. Goodwin ever do to you?

 

VIOLET

What do you fucking think, Lucy?

A moment. Lucy realizes what Mr. Godwin has done to Violet. It is exactly what you think.

LUCY

Oh.

(Beat)

 

Why didn’t you tell someone.

 

VIOLET

Do you honestly, honestly think that would do a damn thing?Think about where we live. 

 

LUCY

I don’t know.

 

VIOLET

The rest of the country might be awake to this shit. But not here.

(Beat)

He was coming for you next.

 

LUCY

You don’t know that.

 

VIOLET

I do.

 

LUCY

No.

 

VIOLET

I saw how he was looking at you. I know what it is. What that look is.

 

LUCY

Oh. Violet? I’m really sorry. That he did that.

 

VIOLET

Are you going to help me with this?

 

LUCY

Yes.

Lucy and Violet each grab a bag of blood. Violet hands Lucy a pair of scissors. Lucy and Violet each grab a bag of blood. Violet hands Lucy a pair of scissors. They slice an end of the bag open and pour it into the pool. They do this a few more times.

 

LUCY

What’s part 2?

 

VIOLET

We smear literal shit on all his fucking windows.

 

LUCY

You have shit just lying around?

 

VIOLET

Not lying around. I bought it of course. From a pig farm outside of town. It's in the cooler in my trunk.

 

LUCY

Smart.

VIOLET

Yes. Gloves. Facemasks. The works. 

They dump a few more bags of blood.

LUCY

So what’s the end game with all this?

VIOLET

We're going to make him fucking pay. He needs to feel SHAME. And GUILT and SUSPICION. Raining down on his head. I want his neighbors to talk. People in tow to fucking talk. And the police to doubt him. He needs to be drive out of town. And whatever next town he goes to, I'll track the fucker down. Find the queen bee at the school there and warn her.

 

LUCY

Ok.

 

VIOLET

This man should never get to work near teenage girls again.

 

LUCY

Violet?

 

VIOLET

Yeah?

 

LUCY

I’m glad you invited me here tonight.

 

VIOLET

I’m glad you came.

They empty more bags of blood into the pool as lights go down.

 

END OF PLAY.